Let me begin by saying: your marital or parental status doesn’t matter to me. This isn’t about why I married young or why I’m happy. It’s about a few things I need people to kindly stop exclaiming when they become aware of my army of children and my wonderful man.
I was married at 21 to a pretty great man. I had my first biological child before my 23rd birthday; we had five foster kids before my 24th. I enjoy the life I choose to live much like I hope everyone else does, whether they’re married, divorced, parenting alone, single and looking to mingle or happy to be alone.
This isn’t about those choices.
It isn’t me going into all the reasons I’m happy and blessed to be married to the man of my dreams. I have a plethora of reasons but none of those pertain to anyone but myself.
No, this piece of literature is meant to be what, I hope, is an eye opener to some of the usual suspects in comments about myself(and many other young married men and women.) It’s a gathering of things I’m sick of hearing, whether it’s murmured in the bars while I’m “stuck at home” or said directly to me in a tone of disgust and disapproval.
Again, allow me to reiterate. I don’t care who you are, who you’re with, who you’re not with. If you’re content, I’m happy for you. This is not written to attack you. It is written for those who assume my discontent and verbalized it. Something I’m a little annoyed with hearing.
Things like “But all the things you’re missing out on!”
This list varies from person to person, in what they are sorry I’m losing out on. Sometimes it’s traveling the world to which I have two responses, who says everyone wants to travel? And where is this rule that traveling can’t happen with a husband and kids?
I’ve never had much of the travel bug. My husband is even worse than I. We are homebodies, enjoying the comfort of our own back yard. And even if I did want to travel, who says I can’t once in married and have kids? I’m just going to leave a few photos here:
Various photos of my family traveling. Before I was 18, I had been to at least 20 continental states, on a cruise, and spent a good amount of each summer on a lake. Family may make traveling harder, but it definitely doesn’t make it impossible.
I’m always love the question “But what about having fun when you’re young?”
I’m having fun, we just usually have a different definition of fun. I’m not saying mine is right, yours is right, we’re both wrong, etc. I’m simply saying that the idea of going out and partying isn’t fun for me. I have a blast sitting in my pajamas and watching Disney movies. It’s a great time here-ask my husband I made him do that before we had our kids too!
Again, I’m not saying you shouldn’t enjoy those things. You should go out, you should experience what makes you happy. But is it so hard to acknowledge what makes you happy does not make me happy?
I hope you’re content in your life. I know I am. I’m just annoyed with the people who insist I must not be.